Colbert finds Don Jr.’s smoking gun

for a whole year we’ve been wondering did the Trump campaign collude with the Russians to affect the u.s. presidential election and finally we have an answer we have another and I don’t care which side you want we all wanted an answer for so long for so long everyone was like man there’s so much smoke there’s so much smoke but we don’t know if there’s a fire we’re on the ground dying from smoke inhalation like I just want to know if there’s a fire I just and today we’re like yes it’s a fire it’s a fire I’m on fire new problem but now I know the truth let’s dive into these emails remember it is going to take careful parsing to prove that the Trump campaign was privately colluding with Russia to get damaging confidential information about Hillary Clinton this is the first email subject Russia Clinton private and confidential he actively tried to collaborate with the Russians before the election yeah yeah when he heard this Donald Trump said good luck trying to connect me to Donald Trump jr. Goldstone goes on to write about their mutual acquaintance Russian pop singer Eman a Guler of good morning Eman just called and asked me to contact you with something very interesting the Crown prosecutor of Russia met with his father Aris this morning and in their meeting offered to provide the Trump campaign with some official documents and information that would incriminate Hillary and her dealings with Russia and would be very useful to her father I’m sorry I just got a little cough because of this smoking gun I just found [Applause] [Music] the Russian said they wanted to team up with the Trump campaign against Hillary Clinton in the American presidential election and Donald Trump juniors response is I love it you would think as a patriot you would say I may not like Hillary but I’m an American first but I love it now this is cool Donald Trump jr. is being represented by homophony who has defended for New York crime families yes that’s a true story yeah I didn’t make that up that’s real so now the lawyer has updated his resume to say defended five New York crime family is totally guilty because there’s this law that says a foreign national shall not directly or indirectly make a contribution or a donation of money or other thing of value you know what Oppo research is a thing of value that’s why you took the meeting and numbnut I’m sorry that was disrespectful I should use his proper name inmate for 171 five [Applause] Jr and maybe Don jr. just doesn’t know how to use the word love appropriately because he’s never heard it growing up but still but so oh okay oh oh yeah yeah you might think oh that’s not fair that’s not fair Donald Trump loves his son but does he stop jr. says today that he released these documents in order to be totally transparent and hours later the president put out a statement through his press office saying my son is a high quality person and I applaud his transparency my son is a high quality person I’m sorry that is not a statement of support in fact that’s not even a compliment it sounds like Trump is just giving himself props my semen makes the highest-quality humans my semen makes the highest quality humans and Eric I would like to issue a formal apology Jim I’d like to apologize to Eric Trump we always thought you were the dumb one we were wrong this isn’t house of cards like this isn’t even veep it wouldn’t even qualify for Blue’s Clues it’s so simple that it wouldn’t it’s just wait no no no blue no blue it’s it’s not necessary we’ve already solved it yeah I know it’s a clue we all know it’s a clue the whole thing is a clue we don’t need you man get out of here go go go I’m mad I didn’t mean it like I didn’t mean it like that sorry blue you’re a high quality person [Music]

You May Also Like

About the Author: admin22